Why Alcoholics Blame Others

Written by The Recovery Village

& Medically Reviewed by Dr. Kevin Wandler, MD

Medically Reviewed

Up to Date

This article was reviewed by a medical professional to guarantee the delivery of accurate and up-to- date information. View our research policy.

Editorial Policy

Last Updated - 07/03/2024

View our editorial policy
If you or a loved one is struggling with addiction, help is available. Speak with a Recovery Advocate by calling (856) 890-9449 now.

Key Takeaways

  • Blame in alcoholism serves as a defense mechanism to avoid personal responsibility and is influenced by complex psychological and social factors.
  • Denial and blame in alcoholism create barriers to recovery by preventing individuals from acknowledging their addiction and seeking help.
  • Alcoholism can lead to cognitive impairments and aggressive behaviors, which may increase the tendency to blame others for one’s actions.
  • Alcohol is often used as a coping mechanism for stress and trauma, but it can lead to negative long-term effects on mental health and decision-making abilities.
  • Blame has a detrimental impact on relationships, eroding trust and communication, and can lead to toxic dynamics.
  • The strain of alcoholism on family and friends includes emotional burden, financial difficulties, and potential long-term psychological effects on children.
  • Alcohol’s effects on self-perception include distorted self-image, lowered self-esteem, and impaired judgment, contributing to the cycle of blame.
  • Overcoming blame in recovery involves fostering personal accountability, therapeutic interventions, and peer support.
  • Therapy and counseling are essential in alcoholism recovery, addressing underlying issues and developing coping strategies.
  • Support systems are crucial for recovery, providing emotional comfort, practical assistance, and influencing healthy lifestyle choices.
  • Self-awareness and acceptance are necessary for overcoming alcoholism, enabling a shift from blame to proactive change.

Why do alcoholics blame others for things that seem to be their fault? This question plagues many people who deal with those suffering from alcohol use disorder. The tendency for alcoholics to blame others is ultimately a defense mechanism. It allows those with alcoholism to avoid confronting the fact they have an addiction.

Understanding the reasons why alcoholics blame others is key to helping yourself or a loved one tackle alcohol use disorder.

Denial as a Mechanism of Blame in Alcoholism

Denial is a psychological defense mechanism where an individual refuses to accept the reality of facts or experiences. They often do this to avoid the anxiety associated with that reality. 

In the context of alcoholism, denial plays a significant role. It allows individuals to evade responsibility for their actions and the consequences of their addiction. By denying the severity of their situation or the impact of their behavior on themselves and others, alcoholics can continue their substance abuse without facing the emotional distress of self-recognition and accountability.

The act of blaming others can be seen as an extension of denial. When alcoholics blame friends, family, or circumstances for their drinking, they are effectively shifting the focus away from their own choices and maintaining the illusion that they are not in control of their addiction. This can create a barrier to recovery, as acknowledging the problem is crucial to seeking help. 

Denial and blame can perpetuate the cycle of addiction. They make it harder for individuals to come to terms with their condition and seek the treatment they need.

Addressing denial is, therefore, a critical aspect of addiction recovery. It involves breaking through the barriers that prevent individuals from seeing the true nature of their addiction and its effects. Treatment and recovery strategies often include therapy and counseling to help individuals overcome denial, accept responsibility, and begin the journey toward healing and sobriety.

The Link Between Alcoholism and the Tendency to Blame Others

Alcoholism often involves a complex interplay between psychological mechanisms and substance abuse. Individuals with alcohol use disorder may find it challenging to accept personal responsibility for their drinking habits and the consequences. This deflection of responsibility can manifest as blaming others. In turn, this behavior is rooted in both denial and the cognitive impairments caused by alcohol.

Alcohol can inhibit the prefrontal cortex, the brain region responsible for judgment, problem-solving, and emotional regulation. This inhibition can lead to impulsive and aggressive behaviors. 

The presence of certain genes, such as the serotonin 2B receptor gene, may also increase the likelihood of aggression and impulsivity when intoxicated. This biological predisposition, combined with the psychological need to protect one’s self-image from the shame and unworthiness associated with addiction, can result in the alcoholic projecting blame onto others.

Additionally, alcohol’s impact on cognitive functions exacerbates the tendency to externalize blame. Idividuals may struggle to connect their actions with their outcomes while under the influence. The relationship between alcohol and aggression further complicates the situation. Alcohol consumption can amplify anger, leading to a cycle of violence and blame. 

Understanding this connection is crucial for addressing the underlying issues. It’s also vital for helping individuals with alcohol use disorder break the cycle of blame and take steps toward recovery.

Understanding Alcoholism as a Coping Mechanism

Alcoholism is frequently characterized as a coping mechanism for managing life’s stressors, traumas, and other psychological burdens. Chronic stress can increase vulnerability to addiction. 

Alcoholism disrupts daily life, relationships, and professional responsibilities, often leading to financial and legal repercussions. More than one in ten people over the age of 12 suffered from alcohol use disorder in 2022.

Alcohol consumption can evolve as a method to cope with challenges. However, alcohol may influence trust, positive affect, and risk-taking behaviors. Therefore, while it may provide temporary relief or positive sensations, alcohol can lead to detrimental long-term effects on one’s mental health and decision-making abilities.

Substance use coping behaviors can mediate the association between alcohol use and depression, potentially leading to co-occurring disorders. Healthcare providers must recognize patients at risk of alcohol relapse and address the underlying stressors that contribute to their drinking behaviors. By understanding the role of alcohol as a coping mechanism, interventions can be tailored. They will ideally replace maladaptive behaviors with healthy coping strategies. This should aid the recovery process and reduce the likelihood of relapse.

The Strain of Alcoholism on Family and Friends

Alcoholism within a family or social circle can be a significant source of stress and strain. It can affect relationships and the well-being of both the individual struggling with addiction and their loved ones. 

Research indicates that family relationships are critical for well-being throughout life. However, the dynamics of these relationships can be profoundly affected by substance abuse. 

The emotional burden on family members often includes feelings of:

  • Guilt
  • Shame
  • Helplessness

They may be unsure of how to help or may become targets of blame by the alcoholic.

Friends also experience the impact of alcoholism. They may witness changes in behavior, unreliability, and even betrayal. The support that friends can offer is often compromised when alcoholism is present. Instead of being a source of positive influence, the relationship may become one-sided or deteriorate completely. Friendships are vital in promoting overall health, but these benefits are at risk when alcoholism enters the equation.

Family and friends may also suffer from the secondary effects of alcoholism, including financial strain, legal issues, and emotional distress. The responsibility of care and support may fall disproportionately on certain family members, leading to further stress and potential resentment. Additionally, children in families affected by alcoholism may experience long-term psychological and emotional effects. These effects can impact their development and future relationships.

Understanding the impact of alcoholism on relationships is crucial for providing appropriate support and resources to families and friends, helping them navigate the challenges and working towards a healthier dynamic.

Strategies for Overcoming Blame in Alcoholism Recovery

To effectively overcome blame, it is essential to foster a sense of personal accountability. It’s also important to understand the underlying causes of this behavior. Recovery programs emphasize the importance of acknowledging past actions and their impact on oneself and others. This acknowledgment is a critical step towards healing and growth.

Therapeutic approaches such as cognitive behavioral therapy can help individuals recognize and challenge patterns of blame. By addressing the feelings of shame and guilt that frequently accompany alcoholism, therapy creates a supportive environment for individuals to develop healthier coping strategies. Moreover, participation in support groups provides a community of peers who understand the challenges of recovery, reinforcing the message that one is not alone in their struggle.

Ultimately, overcoming blame involves a commitment to self-awareness and acceptance. It requires individuals to take ownership of their recovery journey, learning from past mistakes and using them as motivation for positive change. By shifting focus from blame to proactive self-improvement, individuals can build a foundation for long-term sobriety and improved relationships with family and friends.

Recovering From Alcohol Addiction

Alcohol addiction can be difficult and potentially dangerous to recover from on your own. Severe alcohol withdrawal can be deadly, so heavy alcohol users should not attempt to wean off alcohol without the help of a professional medical detox facility. Alcohol addiction treatment will begin with a detox period that focuses on managing any uncomfortable or severe withdrawal symptoms that arise. After detox ends, patients begin a rehab program that teaches them how to cope without alcohol and maintain sobriety.

Detox and rehab can take place in inpatient or outpatient settings. Outpatient treatment is best for mild alcohol addictions, and it allows patients to attend doctor and therapy visits while still living at home. Inpatient treatment is best for moderate to severe alcohol addictions or people who have relapsed. Inpatient treatment involves living on-site at the detox or rehab facility, an approach that keeps patients in a healing environment and allows for better monitoring and treatment.

The Recovery Village

The Recovery Village Cherry Hill at Cooper provides a full continuum of care, from medical detox and inpatient rehab to aftercare. We are here to help you and those you love recover from addiction and begin a healthier, alcohol-free future. Contact us to learn more about alcohol addiction treatment programs that can work well for your needs in recovery.

Authorship

Get your life back

Recovery is possible. Begin your journey today

Call Us Now Admissions Check Insurance

What To Expect

When you call our team, you will speak to a Recovery Advocate who will answer any questions and perform a pre-assessment to determine your eligibility for treatment. If eligible, we will create a treatment plan tailored to your specific needs. If The Recovery Village is not the right fit for you or your loved one, we will help refer you to a facility that is. All calls are 100% free and confidential.

All calls are 100% free and confidential.